let's be REALISTIC here.

the reality of my life situation is, it is impossible for me to move at such a fast pace. why? because the tragedies of this past month has had me struggling against relapse, I need time to go to counselling and physiotherapy, I'm gaining weight even though I don't each much, and I need to work at my own pace. this is ON TOP of all the family bullshit, the toxic environment, my vyvanse dependance, and i can go on and on every day there is something and surprisingly i DO maintain an optimistic outlook, HOWEVER, there are time constraints and logistics which make it impossible for me to work to my standard and get EVERYTHING done. I need to drop a course. I need to slow it down cuz it's not fun this way. but there's no way I'm quitting. it's not even an option. I don't expect ppl to bend over backwards to accomodate me, that's not real life. but I have to accomodate myself. I tested top 2% in Ontario in high school for short term memory and various other attributes. I can do better than this, but first i have to fix some shit. i need time to do that.